


Someday We'll know

by Jaem98



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: A lot of cursing, Bad Boy Choi Yeonjun, Coming of Age, Hate to Love, M/M, Mentions of alcohol, Mentions of peer pressure and bullying, Soft Choi Soobin, Soobin is such a sweetheart, Yeonjun why, have fictional characters unrelated to the members in irl, its fiction, mentions of bts members, mentions of other group members names
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-12 02:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28628142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaem98/pseuds/Jaem98
Summary: Soobin was always misunderstood. He didn't belong. Yeonjun was the popular guy and was always seen as a trouble. But little did they know, Soobin would change Yeonjun's life forever.OrA Walk to Remember inspired au.
Relationships: Choi Beomgyu/Kang Taehyun, Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun, Choi Yeonjun/Huening Kai
Comments: 7
Kudos: 42





	1. In Places No One Will Find

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first full fic. it was something I came up with in the middle of final exams. I apologize in advance for some errors.

Yeonjun was veering, knuckles white as he gripped the steering wheel. The police were hot on his trail, sirens blaring and lights flashing blue and red. The only thing spiralling in Yeonjun’s head was to get away. Get away as fast as his red mustang could take him. Yeonjun knew it was a bad idea. Part of him knew the gravity of it but did he stop to listen to it? No. Because for the sake of some twisted form of entertainment, Yeonjun ignored his gut. And now, he was running for his life, for trespassing. For possibly putting someone’s life in danger. For his idiotic self who ignored the warnings.

Yeonjun veered again, stepping on the accelerator to try and shake the police cars off. Trying, in this futile attempt, to get out of the trouble he had caused for himself. But as he took the next turn, as he thought that he managed to escape, Yeonjun stepped on the brakes instead. He was faced with four police cars; two in front, two at back. And as Yeonjun tried to assess the situation, find a loophole of sorts, he knew there was no escaping anymore. Yeonjun was fucked.

Well, not quite. 

He managed to get himself out of prison, squeezing in some sort of storyline, just to get out of trouble. He needed to do what he needed to do, that’s what he said. One of the places he hated in this town was it's police stations. The room smelled like old men and burnt coffee and it was the last place Yeonjun wanted to be in. 

“Really, Sir. I just was just passing by. Taking a breath of fresh air when I saw him there,” Yeonjun lied through his teeth, crushing the feeling of remorse that had built in the pit of his stomach. He even put on this confused face, hands waved here and there to make whatever performance he did believable.

The sergeant didn’t look like he believed him, left eyebrow arched and eyes staring in judgment. Just like anyone in their small little town. But there was no sufficient evidence and the fact that the kid they so forcefully told to jump off a plank, refused to say anything, it didn't help much in detaining him. So Yeonjun knew that he would get out in no time. So when one of the officers said he could go, Yeonjun split.

Yeonjun did wonder why the kid didn’t talk though. Somewhere deep in his mind, he was curious as to why the kid kept shut. Maybe from embarrassment? Maybe from fear? Who knows. Yeonjun didn’t care. Not really. All he cared about was that he got out of being jailed. 

Not that he was safe from his mother’s own eyes, laced with worry and contempt. “Should I call your father?” she had suggested, too lost on any possibility to help Yeonjun. Yeonjun, on the other hand, had a scowl on his face, groaning on the idea of his father getting involved in any way. The thought of his father annoyed him more than the bruised on his forehead or the sprain on his ankle.

“I don’t need his help,” Yeonjun said, voice laced with all spite that he could muster. 

“This needs to stop between the two of you. Can’t you talk?” His mother asked. Yet Yeonjun scowled, turning to the bowl of cereal. He’s mother simply gave him a sigh.

“You need a father, Yeonjun,” his mother said, but Yeonjun was set on pretending he hadn't heard it at all. And so, without any further arguments, his mother gave up and they headed to church. But even there, Yeonjun wasn’t safe from the scrutiny.

The church itself was more of a chapel, with its usual design and white paint. Everyone in town would attend mass every Sunday. A tradition in their little town. His mother fancied the eighth am mass, which is a time way too early for Yeonjun. Not that he wouldn;t get dragged to mass either way. The mass they specifically attend is the one led By Reverend Choi. 

“Let us rejoice today that a young man's life was saved by the Lord. And pray for the others involved, who were clearly not on the path of righteousness,” Reverend Choi said, eyes staring at Yeonjun for a moment before gazing somewhere else. Of course the reverend would judge him, too. Typical.

Reverend Choi was one of those strict, uptight people in the community. Ones who shake their head to anyone doing any mischief or misconduct. Yeonjun tends to steer clear from them. That’s why when Reverend Choi stared right into Yeonjun with a knowing look as he made his sermon, Yeonjun looked away, his eyes landing on a familiar dark haired, light skin boy.

Choi Soobin.

Choi Soobin was the son of the reverend and one Yeonjun never associated with. Soobin was too...good? And didn't really have the same vibe as Yeonjun. All Yeonjun knew about Choi Soobin was that, other than he was the reverend’s son, he had jet-black hair, a stark contrast to Yeonjun’s blue one. He had fair skin that made him look either pale or angelic. He always wore the exact same cardigan and not the fashionable kind. He was a choir kid who sang in church every Sunday, mostly for his father’s sermon and that he was always cheerful, kind and good. Also that he was in the drama club and would do multiple charities, one Yeonjun never cared to know about. Yeonjun knew Choi Soobin at a young age since they went to the same school since they were in kindergarten but never did he once approached Choi Soobin nor hang out with him at all. And for the most part, Choi Soobin seemed to like his own company, not necessarily bothered by being alone. There were times Yeonjun wondered why but the thought of Choi Soobin seemed too irrelevant for him to completely care. So other than what he already knew, Choi Soobin was just another face in the crowd.

At that very moment, Yeonjun felt a gaze on him, as if someone was staring at him from somewhere. When he turned his gaze towards Hueningkai, the younger had his eyes gazing on Yeonjun which the latter could only describe as fond. Yeonjun had seen that look better, far too familiar with it to forget and he tried, with all his strength,to suppress the need to roll his eyes. Here it was again. The longing stare. Yeonjun wasn’t really in the mood to deal with the younger’s undeniable infatuation, not with what had just happened. So to end it, Yeonjun looked at the younger, eyebrow arched, as if asking ‘What?’. IT was the best he could do without creating a scene and it was enough for the younger to understand.

Hueningkai, on his end, had blushed and a gentle smile formed on his lips. Not actually having anything to say, the younger just drew his gazed back up front. Yeonjun, clearly knowing the reason for the reaction, did the same and what he saw was Choi Soobin with a smile plastered on his face as he stared into the crowd. 

**********

When Monday came rolling in, Yeonjun was sporting crutches. The sprained was bad enough for him to need them. And being stuck in a cast also meant he couldn’t drive. Not that he could, his car was busted from his little race. And so he had no choice but to ask his mom to drive him to school until he could fix his car and get his ankle healed. 

As he got there, the other three were already sitting on a bench. Taehyun and Beomgyu were in their little world, flirting endlessly while HueningKai looked like he was about to either smack them or puke. Seeing the scene, he felt bad for the younger. Taehyun and Beomgyu had a tendency to be all over each other and be overly flirty when they wanted to. The pain Hueningkai must have felt, being stuck as a third wheel. So when HueningKai saw him, Yeonjun could feel the relief on the younger’s face as he smiled widely at him at the approaching Yeonjun. 

“Hyung,” HueningKai exclaimed, diverting Beomgyu and Taehyun’s attention from each other to him. Which was good because Yeonjun swore they were about to make out. 

“Hey, Yeonjunnie Hyung,” Beomgyu said, a smile etched on his face as he wrapped his arms around Taehyun’s neck. Ugh, Couples, Yeonjun thought. This was the last thing he needed in the morning.

“You’re alive!” Beomgyu’s face lit up as he said those words and Yeonjun couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

“Don’t kill me, punk,” Yeonjun said as he slumped down beside Taehyun. Beomgyu just giggled and Taehyun smirked, or smiled. Who knows. What he did know was the fact that the brunette was looking at him with a glint of curiosity in his eyes.

“How’d you get away anyway?” Taehyun asked, an arm wrapped around Beomgyu’s waist.

“Lied my way out,” Yeonjun said, casually. “Said that I just went there to get some air and everything else was a coincidence.”

“Damn, Hyung, really got out of jail, didn’t you?” HueningKai said, earning a smirk from Yeonjun. The younger immediately blushed, a soft smile on his lips. Yeonjun simply sighed at the reaction, looking elsewhere but the younger. That’s when he spotted Choi Soobin with his usual brown Cardigan. He was carrying a box, arms looking frail as he held it. He was looking at his feet, casually looking up to see where he was going. But mostly, his head was hanging low. Typical Choi Soobin. It’s a miracle he hasn’t tripped over.

“Damn, Choi Soobin really has some style, doesn’t he,” Beomgyu said and Yeonjun could hear Taehyun snickering from behind him. 

“Don’t be like that, Babe. It’s the quiet ones you have to look out for. You don’t know when they’ll strike,” Taehyun said, earning a giggle from Beomgyu. Taehyun pecked his lips and Beomgyu gladly took it. Yeonjun felt like puking. Really? Now? 

“True. But seriously. I had the same pair of pants back in 5th grade,” Beomgyu said, voice mocking. The rest of the group laughed again, only Yeonjun smirked. By the time, the laughter died down, Choi Soobin was right by them and HueningKai took this chance to strike.

“Nice, cardigan,” HueningKai said and Yeonjun knew that the younger one was far from sincere. And yet, when he looked at Choi Soobin, the taller didn’t look anywhere near offended. He smiled instead. It was either he didn’t care or he was too oblivious to tone.

“Thank you,” he said, voice soft before taking his leave. The rest of the group was already snickering, laughing out loud the moment Choi Soobin was far enough. Hueningkai, unable to stand the laughter almost fell and Yeonjun thought it was a miracle how Beomgyu and Taehyun stayed exactly as they were even when they were laughing so hard.

“Thank you,” Beomgyu mimicked mockingly as the rest of the group laughed along. Yeonjun laughed, but more forcefully compared to the others. As much as Yeonjun wanted to, there was a side of him that didn’t agree with it. Yet nonetheless he laughed because it’s his friends. Plus, it was just Choi Soobin. No one special.

**********

Yeonjun has come to a conclusion that even in school he had no escape from the prying eyes of the community as his rendezvous with his friends lunged him into the principal’s office. The dingy little room with it’s typical brown walls and wooden furniture was something Yeonjun was very familiar with. The blinds were always closed except for two windows, one facing the courtyard and the other, the reception area. The sun rays that smudged its way through the blinds, hitting just right beside Yeonjun, giving some light into the room. The only tinge of color other than books on the shelves was the principal himself. Yeonjun wondered how anyone would be able to stand to be in a room like this for an hour, let alone everyday for most of the year. The thought baffled Yeonjun and knowing he had been there way too many times for comfort, he had come to a conclusion that the principal’s office had become one of his least favorite places in school. 

Mr. Kim Namjoon, the school principal, with his black hair slicked back and glasses barely hanging on his nose was on his seat. He was slowly placing four bottles on his table, the ones Yeonjun and his friends clearly drank the night before. But it’s not like Yeonjun would tell him that. 

“A witness said that they saw you, Mr. Hueningkai, Mr. Choi Beomgyu and Mr. Kang Taehyun, drinking in the school premises yesterday. Now, Mr. Choi, you are aware of the consequences of breaking school rules, right?” Mr. Kim asked. Yeonjun merely scoffed. There was no use in hiding it so he smirked, eyes glinting with mischief.

“What? Are you going to expel me now?” Yeonjun asked, a sly smile playing on his lips. He knew that with his record, it was only a matter of time that he got expelled. To be honest, it was a surprise he was still in school. Yet Mr. Kim simply gave him a smile.

“No, not yet. Lucky for you, Han JeonWoo isn’t saying anything to point out that you and the others were involved in his little accident. But that doesn't mean you’re off the hook,” Mr. Kim said and Yeonjun had to rack his brain on who the hell Han JeonWoo was until he remembered the kid from the night before. _His name was Han JeonWoo?_ Yeonjun thought.

“You’re punishment will be helping the janitorial staff after school--”

“With pay,” Yeonjun cut in, a sly smile on his face. Mr. Kim mimicked the smile.

“Nice try,” Mr. Kim said. “You will also have a tutoring session with disadvantaged kids every Saturday morning at our sister school and you will have to participate in the drama club’s final event.”

“The Spring Play? Really?” Yeonjun asked, disbelief shutting him up from giving any more snarky remarks. Mr. Kim simply gave him a nod. Yeonjun understood the community service but being in a paly was beyond his imagination. 

“Can I not do the play?” he asked, trying to smile genuinely, hoping somehow it would let him off the hook. But that hope was crushed when a sly smile etched it’s way to Mr. Kim’s lips.

“No,” Mr. Kim said. “And it's not up for debate either.”

Yeonjun slumped down his seat. Of course he wouldn’t be able to get out of it that easily. WHy did he even think he could. Seeing his state of annoyance, Mr. Kim leaned forward, hands clasped against each other.

“You need to spend more time with other people. Start doing things right,” Mr. Kim said. Yeonjun leaned further into his chair, the familiar sermon pestering him. He wasn’t up for it and the only thing he wanted at that moment was to get out of that dingy room. Seeing the reaction, Mr. Kim sighed, leaning back to his own chair. With eyes sharp, he looked at Yeonjun sternly, not knowing what to say other than:

“Don’t blow it, Yeonjun.”

**********

And so, Yeonjun found himself limping and mopping the gymnasium floor at four o’clock while a science fair was commencing. Of all the times an event had to happen, it would be when he was on janitor duties. Not far from where Yeonjun was, stood Choi Soobin, holding up a star frame in front of a bunch of students. So that was what was in the box.

“Do you know what this is?” Soobin asked the students and Yeonjun had to roll his eyes knowing how ignorant people were to the existence of star frames. It was inevitable that people wouldn’t be able to answer. And yet before he could stop himself, Yeonjun had already opened his mouth.

“It’s a star frame,” Yeonjun said, quickly looking away as he said them. Choi Soobin stared at him and if he was surprised at Yeonjun’s unexpected reply, he was good at hiding it. Choi Soobin smiled at Yeonjun, his dimples peeking out before trailing his gaze back to the other students. 

“Yes, it’s a star frame,” Soobin said. “It helps people locate stars and planets with your naked eye.”

Soobin had continued talking about the star frame but Yeonjun couldn’t stay focused when HueningKai, Beomgyu and Taehyun had arrived, copying Yeonjun in a mocking way. When they had passed Choi Soobin, Taehyun, in his own bastardly way, asked him, “Can you see angels up there as well with that?”

Yeonjun had stopped moping after hearing Taehyun’s question, intrigued at how Choi Soobin would react. Would he be offended? Or would he pretend to not hear it? There were multiple ways Yeonjun thought of how Choi Soobin would react. But to his surprise, Choi Soobin smiled and looked towards Taehyun’s way, seemingly unbothered..

“They say some miracles exist. Einstein said that the more he studied the universe, the more he believed in a higher power,” Choi Soobin said. Taehyun, not necessarily expecting the comeback yet still not backing down, smirked at Choi Soobin.

“Well, if there is a higher power, why can’t he get you out of that cardigan?” Taehyun said, smirking in derision towards Choi Soobin, thinking he had won. HueningKai and Beomgyu also let a snicker out, not hiding it. But apparently, Choi Soobin was wittier than Taehyun was.

“He’s too busy looking for your brain,” Choi Soobin’s voice was soft, almost a whisper and yet what he had said was the complete opposite. Yeonjun couldn’t help but snicker at the scene. How Taehyun’s smile was wiped off his face while Beomgyu scowled and glared at Choi Soobin and HueningKai laughing his ass off. Taehyun, unable to respond, glared at HueningKai before making his way to Yeonjun, whom by now had leaned against a pole. Choi Soobin, on the other hand, had returned to teaching the students.

“Lighten up, Tyun. It was a joke,” Yeonjun said. Taehyun just scowled and rolled his eyes before taking Yeonjun's crutches and playing with them. 

“Yeah whatever. Let’s just go,” Taehyun said, voice still laced with annoyance. Yeonjun couldn’t help but let out a small smirk, stopping himself from bursting out into laughter.

“I can't. I gotta stay here,” Yeojun said, knowing full well that if he leaves now, he’d be in much bigger trouble than he’d be. And he had enough of them for a while.

“Come on, Hyung. Let’s go,” Beomgyu said. “Principal Kim isn’t here. We can dip now.”

Yeonjun contemplated. As much as he didn’t want more nuances, he also didn’t want to mop the floors of the gymnasium anymore. Not in this situation. Not when he had a whole ass cast and crutches trying to hold him up. Nope, he wanted to leave with his friends and have fun.

So when his friends walked off, Yeonjun wanted to follow. To just leave right then without any sort of care at all. But as he was about to walk off, he saw Choi Soobin looking at him, face painted with emotions that Yeonjun couldn’t decipher. Yeonjun didn’t understand the look, didn’t understand why Choi Soobin looked at him that way. And didn’t understand that even after Choi Soobin looked away, the eye contact made Yeonjun feel uneasy, almost guilty. And at that moment, Yeonjun contemplated again. Stopped in his tracks and actually contemplated if he should just leave or not. If what he was doing was something good or bad. Why was he feeling like this? What were these feelings? 

He tried to understand but nothing came to mind. All he knew was when he looked at Choi Soobin again, the taller had been too preoccupied with teaching and Yeonjun was left flabbergasted. Damn, what just happened?

**********

In the end, Yeonjun didn’t leave with his friends. Instead, he stayed doing his cleaning duties until the fair was over, which wasn’t really long considering it was only up to six. Yeonjun was still a bit confused as to what had happened earlier with Choi Soobin. They just looked at each other for a minute and yet that minute made Yeonjun feel a thousand different emotions all at once. Most especially, guilt. 

Yeonjun was never really the type to feel like this before. Leaving without notice to have and satisfy his desires for such fun had always been normal to him. And yet he felt guilty to have even thought of dipping out on his job (which wasn’t really his job since he’s still a student) and hanging out with his friends. This was new to Yeonjun. To feel such deep guilt over something so futile. He could have just left but no. Damn Choi Soobin had to give him that look, which until now, Yeonjun still has yet to understand. It was driving him crazy. 

It didn’t help that his friends were pissed at him for missing out on them and ruining the plans they had miraculously made on the spot. So in the end, Beomgyu and Taehyun just went on a date while HueningKai waited for Yeonjun to finish. He had “accidentally” left his car behind and his mom couldn’t pick him up. Yeonjun knew the younger was lying because HueningKai was never really good at hiding how he felt. The blush was the first clue, then the lingering stares. The when the younger had stayed in the car far longer than he should be when they were already at his house.

“Thanks for driving me home,” HueningKai said, a soft smile on his lips. Yeonjun just returned the smile, too tired to even speak. 

“My parents aren’t home. You can come inside,” HueningKai said and Yeonjun could hear the hope in the tone of the younger’s voice. He dreaded it. Especially when he knew how he couldn’t reciprocate the younger’s feelings. Not when he knew that the younger hoped for nothing. Yeonjun let out a sigh, a bitter taste in his mouth.

“Come on Hyuka. We’ve been over this,” Yeonjun said, looking straight into HueningKai’s eyes. “It’s over.”

Yeonjun could see the hope drain out of HueningKai’s eyes, replaced with sadness. It was really already over, him and HueningKai, for a while now but the younger still hadn’t moved on. It was a short relationship but still it must have meant a lot to the younger. Which was why Yeonjun felt bad for saying it so harshly. But he knew that if he went along with it, if he indulged the younger, it’d only be troublesome. For both of them. 

“Yeah, I-I know,” HueningKai said as he tried his best to form a smile. “I’ll just-- I’ll go in now, hyung. See you tomorrow.”

HueningKai immediately got out of the car, the conversation proving too much for the younger and never once did he look back towards Yeonjun. Yeonjun, on the other hand, just looked away, sighing heavily. He didn’t know what to do nor did he want to even try and make HueningKai feel better. For him, it was better to reject the younger coldly than to smoothly ease things up with him only for Yeonjun to reject him afterwards. It was the only decision he could make. That is, it was the only decision Yeonjun could think of. So without any delay, Yeonjun immediately drove off, his foot throbbing as he stepped on the pedal. He mentally noted to ask Beomgyu to drive him around for a while, because damn, his foot hurts and he just wanted to rest. Fuck this predicament his in.

**********

“Jjunie… Jjunie. Choi Yeonjun.”

Yeonjun woke up to his mother’s voice waking him. Yeonjun groaned at the sound and ignored her, his sleep being much more important than whatever she wanted him to do. His mother simply smiled and continued on her quest to wake him up.

“Come on, Yeonjun-ah! Wake Up!” his mother said, a bit loudly this time. And yet Yeonjun still ignored her. The bed was way too comfortable and Yeonjun wasn’t going to get up anytime soon. When his mother seemed like she’d had enough, she let out a huge sigh before raising her voice louder.

“Choi Yeonjun! Get up!” his mom said, her voice in a higher volume than it had been followed by three series of claps and her shaking him awake. Yeonjun’s eyes immediately shot open, the sounds and the shaking proving too loud for even sleep to conquer and without warning the sunlight was the first thing he saw. Yeonjun tried to adjust his sight, the sunlight shining too brightly in his eyes that he had to squint them. It took Yeonjun a good minute to remember where he was and what day it was. It was Saturday. Fucking Saturday. Why the hell was his mom waking him up so early? 

“Mom, it’s Saturday. No school,” Yeonjun said, groaning as he tried to get his precious sleep back. And yet he could still feel her presence beside him. He could hear his mom smile before she replied.

“Tutoring, remember?” she said and Yeonjun, for the second time that morning, had woken up again and only then did he remember that he had to do tutoring today. Yeonjun scowled as he stood up from his bed, hair messy while his mom looked at him, smiling brightly.

“Breakfast is ready in ten minutes. Go get dressed and come down, okay?” his mother said and placed a kiss on the top of his head before leaving his room. Yeonjun, however, was still on his bed, spacing out at the epiphany that his Saturdays were taken away from him. He felt the dread creep up into his body as the thought crossed his mind. The amount of regret Yeonjun felt was immeasurable knowing that no matter how much he tried to struggle his way out of this situation, he'll still be back to it. Yeah, sure he could just skip out and not actually do the tutoring. But then he’d be back in Mr. Kim’s office and another set of lectures and punishments could be dealt with. Not to mention, his mom would not let him hear the end of it. So as much as Yeonjun dreaded to do it, he found himself on the school bus on the way to the place where he is supposed to tutor kids. 

And yet, Yeonjun’s dilemma continues. As if losing his Saturdays wasn’t enough, he got stuck with a brat who refused to even look at him, let alone talk. He tried, per se, to teach the kid the difference between the similar and isosceles triangle. 

“Okay tell me, what’s the difference between these two triangles,” he asked the kid. But the kid, who he didn’t even bother to know the name of, gave him a scowl and Yeonjun was at his wits end trying. He repeated himself again but the kid himself just wouldn’t budge. So after a few repetitive questions, the kid finally stood up, hands slammed on the table as he said, “Man, this is bullshit.”

Yeonjun sighed, flicking the pencil from his hand as he said, “You and me both, kid.”

Oh, how Yeonjun wanted to punch the living hell out of him but he had to admit, he agreed with the kid. This was bullishit. One he put himself in. When he looked back, he saw Choi Soobin looking at him, a worried expression painted on his face. The kid he was tutoring was also looking at Yeonjun the same way. It only pissed Yeonjun off even more. He didn’t need pity nor worry from someone like Choi Soobin. He didn’t need him to look at Yeonjun as if he was the most pitiful or useless person in the world. So out of pure annoyance, Yeonjun stood up and bolted out the school and back inside the school bus. Anywhere was better than that damn library.

**********

The noise of students boarding the bus woke Yeonjun up. He had unknowingly fallen asleep waiting for the others to arrive. He didn’t know how long he slept, only that when he finally came to, the bus was almost ready to leave. Yeonjun tried to recall what he was doing sleeping on the school bus in the first place when the events earlier replayed in his head.

Yeonjun let out a low scowl as he remembered what happened. Yeonjun isn’t the most patient person. So when the kid wouldn’t listen, Yeonjun almost blew up. The last thing he needed was an annoying brat who doesn;t give a damn. 

Okay he needed to calm down. There’s no use in thinking about a dumb kid who won’t even try. So in order to relax, Yeonjun took out his airpods and immediately played some music. He didn’t care if it was loud enough for others to hear, he just needed peace and quiet. So Yeonjun fancied himself to his music and the view outside. Only then did he notice that the bus had already moved.

When the view outside deemed boring, Yeonjun looked around the bus and noticed Choi Soobin looking at him. Yeonjun was taken back, not expecting the gaze on him. Choi Soobin had this look in his eyes, like the one back in the gymnasium yet unlike that one, this was easier to read. Choi Soobin had a glint of interest in his eyes with a hint of hope. Yeonjun didn’t exactly know what Choi Soobin was hoping for but Yeonjun didn’t want to find out. So to avoid the situation, Yeonjun did what he did best. He rolled his eyes before trailing his gaze outside. He hoped within himself that Choi Soobin would get the picture. 

But it seemed that Yeonjun’s luck had been running out these days. Because a few seconds after he wished for it, Yeonjun felt the seat beside him dip, almost as if someone sat beside him. _Oh universe, why do you hate me?_ Yeonjun thought. It didn’t take a psychic to know that it was Choi Soobin who sat beside him. And Yeonjun had half a mind to tell him to get lost but Choi Soobin had already started talking before he could.

“Hey, do you want to buy some raffle tickets?” Choi Soobin asked, not really waiting for Yeonjun’s answer. Yeonjun didn’t really want to answer nor did he bother to.

“We’re trying to raise enough money to help provide for computers for the students to use,” Choi Soobin said. Yeonjun looked at him, lips pursed into a tight smile.

“No,” was all Yeonjun said before looking back out the window. He thought maybe it worked in driving Choi Soobin away. That, finally, the taller had left because not a single sound was uttered. Which was good considering Yeonjun wasn’t really in the mood to talk and the last person he wanted to talk to was Choi Soobin. But apparently, that was all wishful thinking and Chois Soobin was still there, sitting beside him, smile wide.

“So I saw you in there with Doyun,” Choi Soobin paused for a bit. “Maybe you should try it in a different way. Like maybe try backing into it from somewhere else.”

Yeonjun ignored him. He did not want to talk to Choi Soobin and hoped that maybe, just maybe, he would get the picture. But the boy is very dense considering he still continued to talk even after Yeonjun had given him the cold shoulders.

“Are you going to visit Han JeonWoo?” Choi Soobin asked. Out of all the people Choi Soobin had to bring up, it would be that kid. Choi Soobin was starting to piss him off. For Someone who liked being alone, Choi Soobin was really a nosey body. Yeonjun kept ignoring him, turning up the volume on his phone a bit higher than it was. But amazingly, he could still hear Choi Soobin talking.

“That would be a “no”,” the taller said. “Did you know that they moved him from the hospital to the rehabilitation center.”

Yeonjun out of pure frustration, yanked out one of his airpods and looked at Choi Soobin straight in the eyes. “Is this your idea of small talk? Cause if it is, then your social skills need some work,” Yeonjun said, voice harsh and condescending. It was a bit too much but Yeonjun has had enough. Clearly, Choi Soobin hadn’t understood that Yeonjun didn’t want to talk to him.

“Plus, nobody forced the kid to jump. He did that on his own,” Yeonjun said, explaining himself. Wait, why was he even explaining himself?

“It’s called “peer pressure”,” Soobin explained.

“And how would you know about that?” Yeonjun challenged. “You read it in your precious book?”

There was a pause as Choi Soobin took a deep breath. The question might have been too much but at this point, Yeonjun had no longer cared if he hurt the taller’s feelings or not.

“Please don’t act like you know me,” Choi Soobin said, voice pleading. Yeonjun couldn't help but scoff.

“Oh, but I do. I do,” Yeonjun said, tone confident and lips curved into a smirk. “We’ve all had the same classes since kindergarten.”

Choi Soobin looked at him patiently, face beaming in curiosity, waiting for Yeonjun to continue. To which Yeonjun obliged. “Well, your Choi Soobin. You sit at lunch table number 34, which isn’t exactly the reject table. But is definitely in self-exile territory. You exactly have one Cardigan and you like to look at your feet when you walk. Oh and yeah, for fun you like to tutor on the weekends and hangout with your friends from either poetry class or stars and planets. How’s that sound?” Yeonjun said, the smirk still painted on his lips. He thought maybe now, he had won this little competition they had on. But instead, he got a smile. A warm, soft smile from Choi Soobin.

“Thoroughly predictable,” Choi Soobin said. “Nothing I haven’t heard before.”

Yeonjun was confused. Why was Choi Soobin smiling? And why was he so relaxed after all of that? It was as if he didn’t care.

“You don’t care about what other people think of you?” Yeonjun asked, even before he could stop himself. It was odd to Yeonjun to even consider the possibilities. Because, we care about what other people think of us. So it applies to Choi Soobin, too, right?

No. No it doesn’t.

Because as Yeonjun asked the question, Choi Soobin’s smile never faded nor faltered, eyes gazing back at Yeonjun. And when he answered, the warm, honey like tone of his voice proved how wrong Yeonjun was.

“No,” was all Soobin said. A single word. But the effects it had on Yeonjun was massive. He didn’t understand what it was and why he was feeling it. All he knew was that for the last two conversations, it was always like this with Choi Soobin. And even after Choi Soobin left towards back to his seat, the unknowing feeling still lingered. What was happening?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked it. This took a while to write cause things are busy here. Thank you. Also wifi...


	2. I Could Use A Fresh Beginning Too

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeonjun and Soobin actually got close and migth actually become friends. Or will they?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2. I'm sorry it took so long to upload this. Hope You enjoy!!!

It still bothered Yeonjun. The lingering feeling he had. He couldn’t understand what he felt after the conversation with Choi Soobin. He tried to ponder on it but it only made Yeonjun’s head hurt. Maybe it was just indigestion. Yeah, maybe he ate something bad then and felt weird. It’s not like he could actually be interested in Choi Soobin. No way. That would be impossible. This was Choi Soobin for heaven’s sake. He would never be interested in him. Plus, other than school, it’s not like he’ll see him anyway, right?

Yeonjun spoke too soon.

One of the many punishments Mr. Kim had so gracefully given Yeonjun was to be part of the Spring Play. It was the one thing he dreaded among all his punishment because in no means would Yeonjun ever act on it. He’d rather spend his time in jail than pretend to be someone, something, else. Yet somehow the universe hates him because two things he dreaded the most to happen, happened. 

The first thing is Choi Soobin. 

When Beomgyu had driven him to the play practice, an hour late (but it’s not like Yeonjun cared), the last person he ever wanted to see when he walked through the doors of the theater was Choi Soobin. How the hell did Yeonjun forget that Choi Soobin was part of the drama club? AMong all the things, why’d he forget that? And of course, the taller would be here. Damn was this day starting off tough. And it didn’t help that the lingering feeling Yeonjun felt during the ride home from the bus had crept back in the pit of his stomach the moment he saw the latter. Choi Soobin, on the other hand, seemed unbothered, unaware of Yeonjun’s inner turmoil. 

Yeonjun would have stayed by the door frame, body supported by the crutches, contemplating on what he was supposed to do (while not so subtly stare at Choi Soobin the whole time) if Mr. Park Jimin hadn’t called out his name. Yeonjun, in his moment of tardiness, had interrupted the teacher from his explanation. 

“Mr. Choi, we’re so happy you could make it. Please take a seat,” Mr. Park said yet his face said otherwise. Yeonjun, not really caring, followed Mr. Park’s instructions and took the seat away from Choi Soobin. The last thing he needed was to sit near the latter when he still couldn’t understand what had happened.

“All right then. Shall I continue?” Mr. Park asked, yet it didn’t really pose a question because right after he asked, he continued speaking. “In this play, we will have Yeji as our Caroline."

Hwang Yeji, a girl with cat-like eyes and hair incredibly straight hair sat right beside Choi Soobin. She had a huge smile on her face as she heard her name. Yeonjun vaguely remembered that she was on the same level as him and Choi Soobin but in no means does he remember talking to her. To Yeonjun, she seemed like someone he didn’t really hang out with. Yeji, on the other hand, unaware of Yeonjun’s assessment of her, seemed rather delighted to be given the role of Caroline as her face lit up at the announcement.

"Soobin, the person behind our songs, will play Andrew," Mr. Park said and Choi Soobin simply smiled at the announcement. Hwang Yeji, on the other hand, seemed way excited for Choi Soobin. Even more than the taller himself. But at this point, Yeonjun had tuned out everything. Or at least he tried. Not that he could because as he was about to doze off in the middle of role assignments, the second thing he dreaded the most that day happened.

"Choi Yeonjun will read Tommy Thornton," Mr. Park said and Yeonjun felt like he went deaf for a second. Wait, did he just say my name? Yeonjun thought.

"Uh, Mr. Park, I'm sorry but I didn't come here to act," Yeonjun said, trying to get out of the situation. The last thing he needed was to get anymore involved in this play as he already did. He just wanted a role that could pose to be helpful enough to get Mr. Kim off his back but not so big that people would notice him sneak out in the middle of the practice. This wasn’t it.

"Well, you joined Mr. Choi. That means you have to act," Mr. Park said.

Not by choice! Yeonjun wanted to say but he couldn't get a word out as Mr. Park didn't even bother to wait for his reply.

"And Mr. Choi, you fit the role most in this play. So please do your best," Mr. Park said and judging from how tight and forced his smile is, Yeonjun knew he couldn't escape the whole thing. 

**********

“How did you know, Tommy?” Yeji asked, voice high and smile wide to the point her eyes turned crescent. She was trying to stay in character.

“Know what?” Yeonjun asked, not really paying attention. He was still too dumbstruck at the fact that he got the lead role. So much for not acting. 

“That we were in love,” Yeji said and Yeonjun assumed that she was probably used to this kind of thing as she answered Yeonjun gracefully, as if the lines itself weren’t scripted but something she would say often. Yeonjun just went along with it, too tired to try.

“Love...uh,” Yeonjun started, trying to focus his mind to whatever he was reading. “Believe me, doll face, you don’t wanna go falling in love with someone like me.”

“It’s too late, Tommy. I’m already crazy about you. I’m breathing it, drinking it all on, aren’t you?” Yeji answered in a heartbeat and Yeonjun couldn’t help but admire her dedication to the craft, even if the line itself seemed outrageous.

“Uhm… I-I don’t know what I’m drinking, darling but if this is love, pour me another glass?” Yeonjun said, laughing at the last part of the sentence. The lines were too much for him. Too audacious. Who would even say things like this, Yeonjun thought. Yeonjun looked up from his script, face amused at the thought, and saw Lee Heeseung, the playwright, stare at him in disbelief. Yeonjun simply smirked.

“Mr. Choi, are you trying to be bad at this?” Mr. Park asked and Yeonjun could tell from the scowl on his face that he wasn’t pleased as he had tried to hide it with a smile. Yeonjun, instead of backing down, just simply smiled and continued his little play.

“Uh, no. It just comes naturally,” he said and Mr. Park could do nothing but shake his head at Yeonjun’s antics. Out of the corner of his eyes, Yeonjun could see a small smile etched around Choi Soobin’s lips. That despite his futile effort, the latter couldn’t help but laugh along. And for some unknown reason, that made Yeonjun satisfied.

**********

It has officially become the worst day of Yeonjun’s life. 

Well, second worst day. Not only did he get stuck in a theatre for three hours practicing a play he clearly didn’t want to be in, Beomgyu forgot to pick him up. It had happened after practice when Yeonjun was forced to wait outside the theater in the blazing heat waiting for the latter to arrive. Yeonjun had tried his best to contact the younger, texting and calling and yet not one reply. He was getting irritated and it didn’t help that it was humid.

Little by little, the people that had swarmed the front of the theater hall slowly dissipated, going on their merry way home while Yeonjun stood by himself, in crutches, waiting for his best friend to pick him up. Yeonjun thought that he’d have to sucker punch Beomgyu the moment he saw the latter. He was his only ride home since his mom was in work. 

Yeonjun sighed for the nth time, keeping an eye on the road for a familiar grey jeep yet nothing came. Maybe he was too caught up in his irritation or maybe too busy waiting for Beomgyu that he hadn’t noticed Choi Soobin walking up to him. The latter had noticed Yeonjun standing by himself, his body supported by the crutches.

“Would it kill you to try?” Choi Soobin asked the moment he got closer. Yeonjun, not expecting him to even say hi, didn’t bother to throw around. Instead he answered Choi Soobin with a sarcastic line, a smile etched into a smirk.

“Yup. And I’m too young to die,” he said. Yeonjun didn’t see but he could hear the taller letting out a smile. He just didn’t know if it was sincere or not.

“So, you don’t care about classes and graduating. But you like school because you’re popular and would never be popular again,” Choi Soobin said. That somehow piqued Yeonjun’s interest. Choi Soobin could be interesting if he wanted to be.

“That’s thoroughly predictable,” he said, a smile slowly etched on his face, thinking within himself that he had outwit Choi Soobin. But Yeonjun has jumped to conclusions way too many times and he should have learned that at this point, he can’t outwit Choi Soobin. But of course, Yeonjun’s ego wouldn’t let him admit it.

“Your act only works on an audience,” Choi Soobin said before taking his leave. Yeonjun wanted to argue. Wanted to tell Choi Soobin that he was wrong. But Yeonjun couldn’t. Because somewhere deep inside him, he knew Choi Soobin was right and he hated it. 

But despite the fact that he hated how Choi Soobin made him feel, Yeonjun wasn’t going to let himself die from heatstroke. When there was absolutely no sign of Beomgyu’s car, Yeonjun did what he knew was the best to get himself out of the situation. Choi Soobin.

Choi Soobin had a car. It was a beat up old sedan car that needed some serious deal of renovations. But Yeonjun wasn’t one to complain, especially not in the situation he was currently in. He needed a ride and as much as he didn’t want it to be Choi Soobin, he didn’t have a choice. So he slowly walked in front of Choi Soobin’s car, trying to get the taller’s attention. It was dumb and if Choi Soobin wasn’t such a goody-two shoes, he’d be dead then. But hey, it worked. When Yeonjun was sure that he got Choi Soobin’s attention, he moved towards the driver seats window and with a sly smile he asked, “Can I hitch a ride?”

Choi Soobin looked reluctant to agree at first, the conversation earlier not faring well and Yeonjun can’t really blame him. After all, other than the play and the school bus incident, this was the most he’d even talked to Choi Soobin. So if the taller refused, Yeonjun would understand but he’d be stuck in front of the theater and who knows when Beomgyu would show up. But it seemed that Yeonjun hadn’t completely ran out of luck because after a few minutes and with a deep sigh, Choi Soobin nodded. Yeonjun didn’t waste a breath and made his way towards the passenger seats, not forgetting to throw his crutches into the backseat. 

“Did you really have to throw them there?” Choi Soobin asked and Yeonjun, not seeing the problem, just shrugged. Despite the displeasure though, Choi Soobin didn’t ponder on Yeonjun’s action and instead just started driving.

The drive itself was awkward, considering their strange relationship and other than the engine running, there were no other noises. Maybe it got too much or maybe he just wanted to but Choi Soobin, amidst the awkward silence, turned the radio on. It was playing some sort of sweet romantic song that just didn’t sit right with Yeonjun so before he could stop and think, his finger had already changed the station. The music was heavy metal and maybe it didn’t suit his taste as Choi Soobin countered by changing it back and for a small moment they were in a game of back and forth with the radio, until finally, Choi Soobin got tired.

“I forfeit,” Choi Soobin said.

“Thank you,” was Yeonjun’s reply before looking out the window, amusing himself with the familiar streets of their merry, little town.

“Thirty-Four…” Choi Soobin mumbled and Yeonjun almost missed it amidst the noise.

“What?” Yeonjun asked, curious at what the number meant.

“Thirty-Four,” Choi Soobin repeated, eyes fixated on the road.

“Thirty-Four? W-What does that mean?” Yeonjun asked.

“Thirty-Four is to befriend someone I don’t like,” Choi Soobin said. Yeonjun couldn’t help but feel a little hurt by the statement. He shouldn’t be hurt at all but somehow he is and he could do nothing but look away from Choi Soobin. Choi Soobin, as oblivious as he always is to Yeonjun’s dilemmas, continued to explain what the number meant.

“It’s like a to-do list I made, except it’s for my life,” Choi Soobin said. 

“Like what? Getting a new personality?” Yeonjun asked wryly. Yet Choi Soobin stayed unfazed.

“Mhm...travel the world, write a book,” Choi Soobin started.

“That’s ambitious,” Yeonjun intervened yet Choi Soobin continued his little list.

“Be in two places at once, get a tattoo. Maybe even get my ears pierced,” Choi Soobin said and though he stopped talking about it, Yeonjun felt like there was more. That what Choi Soobin had mentioned was only the tip of the iceberg. Befriending someone he didn’t like was at thirty-four, what more were there?

Then a thought came to Yeonjun. What was number one, he wondered. It wouldn’t hurt to ask Choi Soobin about it, right? He already told Yeonjun about the others. What harm can asking the number one to-do list bring? And yet, Yeonjun was a bit hesitant to ask. Somehow, some part of him didn’t want to push. But his curiosity got the better of him and before he knew it, he was already asking.

“What’s number one?” Yeonjun asked. 

“I’d tell you. But then I’d have to kill you,” Choi Soobin said, a sly smile on his lips. Yeonjun himself couldn’t help but smile along. Choi Soobin could be witty and cute if he wanted to be. He didn’t think he would actually enjoy the taller’s company. Maybe it wasn’t so bad to be friends with Choi Soobin, Yeonjun thought. But as the thought flashed into his mind, he saw his friends right outside the town diner, huddled together in a conversation.

The first thing that came to Yeonjun was the immense annoyance as one of the people at that diner was Beomgyu, the person who he asked to drive him and pick him up from play practice. And oh, how much did he want to give the younger a piece of his mind. Or his first, whichever comes first.

The second thing that came to Yeonjun was the instinct to hide because no, he did not want his friends to see him in the same car as Choi Soobin. As much as Yeonjun has somewhat enjoyed the taller’s company, he wasn’t as comfortable letting his friends see them together. No, not even a glimpse. So Yeonjun did the best he could with the situation he was in. He ducked under the compartment glove, squeezing within the tiny space. It wasn’t the most graceful decision nor was it the most comfortable place to hide but with the car driving by so fast, Yeonjun didn’t really have time to think. So he hid, underneath the compartment, as if he could. In the midst of his despair, Yeonjun could hear a chuckle by his side. Great! Now he looked like an idiot.

“You can come out now. We passed them already,” Choi Soobin said. Yeonjun squeezed himself out of his position, looked outside the window and true enough they had passed them. Yeonjun let out a deep sigh, the sense of relief coursing through him. 

“You know, you didn’t have to hide under there?” Choi Soobin said.

“Uh, yes I did. Look, as nice as it is that we’re getting along. We’re not that close yet so-”

“So you don’t want your friends to see us together. I know that,” Choi Soobin said. “I mean that you didn’t have to hide because the glass windows are tinted. Even if you didn’t hide, they wouldn’t have seen you.”

Yeonjun turned his head to look at the window and true enough it was tinted. Yeonjun had never felt so dumb in his entire life. If he had just stopped to think, maybe observed, around the car then maybe he wouldn’t have had to embarrass himself by doing what he had done. Damn was he dumb. Amidst his inner turmoil, Yeonjun could hear Choi Soobin chuckling by the driver's seat. 

“What are you laughing at?” Yeonjun asked, voice laced with annoyance. The last thing he needed at the moment was Choi Soobin making fun of him.

“Nothing. It’s just, you looked adorable,” Choi Soobin said and for a second, Yeonjun’s heart just skipped a beat. Wait, hold up. What the hell was that? Yeonjun thought. Did he just call me adorable? Yeonjun didn’t understand. Nor did he expect the latter to say those words to him. He wasn’t sure if that was Choi Soobin’s way of flirting or something. Or if he just said it because that's how he felt and there was no other underlying intention behind it. Just a compliment--well, with a little mocking--but definitely just that. But no matter how many times Yeonjun tried to think of the compliment, whether it be something or nothing, he still couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason for it. So for the rest of the drive home, Yeonjun’s mind immediately went blank, full of nothing but Choi Soobin’s comment.

**********

“I am sorry. I forgot. It won’t happen again,” was the first thing Beomgyu said as he got inside Yeonjun’s house and the latter had half a mind to kick him out again for what happened. The fact that he forgot alone made Yeonjun’s blood boil. But lucky for Beomgyu, he was the last of Yeonjun’s problems at the moment. The rest of the car ride had been a bit too quiet for Yeonjun’s liking but it’s not like he could actually say anything. It’s not like he could say, “Oh, thanks. You’re adorable, too” or something to Choi Soobin. That’d be weird.

The whole thing just made Yeonjun feel weird, to the point that the anger he had for Beomgyu was nothing but a lingering feeling left ignored. 

“Just don’t do it again. Or you’re dead meat,” Yeonjun said, but there wasn’t that much malice within his voice. Beomgyu broke into a smile, acting like his usual bubbly self.

“Oh good,” he said as he skipped towards one of the sofas. “Now, you said you wanted my help for something. What is it?”

“I need help rehearsing,” Yeonjun said, flopping down the sofa in front of Beomgyu. He was dead tired but he needed to do this. The sooner this was over, the better.

“Rehearsing? The Play?” Beomgyu asked. “You’re seriously doing this? You could just dip out, you know?”

“And what? Have not only Mr. Kim but as well as Mr. Park and the whole cast and crew after my ass. Yeah, no,” Yeonjun said, scowling. “Plus, it's not like I have a choice. They put me as lead, so I can’t escape. And to top that off, I have two month to memorize this.”

Beomgyu’s loud laugh echoed through the entire living room and he was on the sofa rolling as he clutched his stomach. Yeonjun's face only got even darker and a low groan of annoyance escaped his lips. It was a good while before Beomgyu could even let out any words.

“You’re telling me, they put you as lead. Man, that’s awesome. They actually think you can act,” Beomgyu said and once again fell in a roar of laughter. Yeonjun immediately threw the throw pillows at him, not knowing what to do with the younger.

“Okay, I’m sorry,” Beomgyu said, trying to calm himself down. “Now why don’t we get practicing the uhm pfft--the script.”

Yeonjun didn’t budge. He just stayed where he was, sulking in annoyance. Beomgyu, seeing the older’s state, walked up to the older. He did feel bad for Yeonjun considering the older took all the fall for what dumbassery they did. 

“Look, Hyung, you know I’m just messing with you, right?” Beomgyu said, putting a hand on the older’s shoulder. Yeonjun looked at him with a smirk yet knew that there was more to what the younger wanted to say. “You can count that I’ll be there. Front row. Opening night. With tomatoes. Even if I hate them.”

Yeonjun gave out a smirk, one mimicked by Beomgyu. Yeonjun has always learned that Beomgyu might be annoying sometimes, but he’s the one he can rely on the most. The one friend Yeonjun could count on anything. That is, anything but practicing for a play. Because damn is the boy bad at it. 

In the middle of their endless practice, Yeonjun couldn't focus because the younger either read with no feelings or he did read with them but would eventually do something dumb to make it look like a joke. Beomgyu’s dramatic ass would come out if he thought the whole thing became too boring for his liking. And man was Beomgyu dramatic. So with all the day wasted, Yeonjun had no choice but to ask the very person he knew could help him, Choi Soobin.

Yeonjun didn't want to. Not after what happened. But other than Choi Soobin, he wasn't really close with any other student from the cast and staff. So when Monday came rolling in, with a nervous heart, Yeonjun walked up to Choi Soobin. The taller was by his locker, preparing for his next class.

"Hey, Soobin," Yeonjun called but he was too nervous to continue. Asking for a favor from Choi Soobin knowing they weren't really that close. That was bold of Yeonjun, especially after how he treated Choi Soobin during the car ride home. 

"What is it, Yeonjun?" Choi Soobin asked. "I've known you for years. You'd never been the first one to come up and say 'hello'."

"Uhmm… Can you do me a favor?" Yeonjun asked. Choi Soobin didn't look at him, too preoccupied with his own task. This should have pissed Yeonjun off but for some reason, he knew Choi Soobin was listening. So Yeonjun continued, hands opening and closing from sweat.

"Can you help me practice my script? Cause you know, I don't wanna mess things up and this is for the play. And you know, you don't want to ruin the play, right? So help me with the script, so the play can run smoothly and…" at this point Yeonjun was rambling on. He had no idea what he was saying or if what he was saying ever made sense. All he knew was that he needed Choi Soobin's help and he needed it fast. 

Choi Soobin closed his locker, shutting Yeonjun up immediately. The former had this amusing look on his face as he turned to Yeonjun, smile wide and eyes twinkling. 

"You've never asked anyone for a favor before, haven't you?" Choi Soobin asked and Yeonjun's words got caught in his throat. Other than Beomgyu, Taehyun and Hueningkai, Yeonjun never really talked, let alone asked someone any favors. So yeah, he wasn't the best at asking favors. Seeing Yeonjun's speechless state, Choi Soobin walked away, prompting Yeonjun to follow.

"Okay, no. I'm not good at asking favors. But Soobin, can you please help me. I don't actually want to screw this play up and I know you don't want that, too. So please, please, please help me out," Yeonjun said, hands clamped together. Choi Soobin chuckled and it baffled Yeonjun why.

"You don't have to nudge my guilt a lot. I was going to help you either way," Choi Soobin and Yeonjun swore he had met an angel. He was about to thank Choi Soobin for agreeing when the latter spoke up again.

"But I do have one condition though," Choi Soobin said and Yeonjun tilted his head in curiosity.

"Okay, what is it?" He asked.

"You have to promise me, you won't fall in love with me," Choi Soobin said and Yeonjun was dumbfounded for a moment. Did he just go deaf? Or did he hear it right? Fall in Love? Him? With Choi Soobin? That's outrageous. Yeonjun scoffed, completely dumbstruck by what he heard.

"Don't worry. That won't ever happen," Yeonjun said, confident with his answer. Never would he ever fall in love with Choi Soobin. The taller’s face lit up, a smile forming on his face. For a second, Yeonjun's heart does something but before he could dwell on it, Choi Soobin spoke.

"Good then. Meet me at my house later. You know where it is, right?" Choi Soobin asked. Yeonjun was still a bit in a daze so he only nodded. Choi Soobin seemed satisfied with the answer and after a simple 'okay', he went on his merry way, leaving Yeonjun confused by himself.

**********

Yeonjun wasn't the most excited at the moment. How could he be excited when he was standing on the porch of the Reverend's house. He wasn't one of the Reverend's favorites and the feeling was mutual, so to have been standing by his door, on his porch, didn't sit well with Yeonjun. But there was no choice since it was where Choi Soobin asked to meet. And it's not like he could argue, he was the one who asked the favor. So even when he didn't want to, he pressed the doorbell. Choi Soobin didn’t answer immediately and all Yeonjun could hear were voices talking before a pair of footsteps came walking up the door. A few seconds later, the door opened to reveal Choi Soobin.

"Hey," Yeonjun said.

"Hello," Choi Soobin replied and for a few minutes, they stayed like that. Looking at each other in a comfortable silence. Yeonjun doesn't know why but he liked the atmosphere. Liked the little moment they had. But reality had stormed his brain, reminding him why he was there in the first place.

"Aren't you going to let me in?" Yeonjun said, smile on his lips. The exact same smile were on Choi Soobin's sighed before giving way to Yeonjun.

"Come in," Choi Soobin said as Yeonjun made his way in. "My script is upstairs. Let me just get it. Make yourself at home."

Yeonjun simply nodded and did as told. He let his eyes roam around the living room, taking in every detail as much as he could. Choi Soobin's house was a bit like his own, except Choi Soobin's house was a bit more... religious as Yeonjun would put it. It was also a tad bit darker with the brown wallpaper. Talk about boring, Yeonjun thought. He was in the middle of admiring, judging, Choi Soobin's house when he turned and saw the Reverend.

"Jes-" Yeonjun almost cursed.

"No, Soobin's father," Reverend Choi said, cutting Yeonjun off. Reverend Choi stood as tall as Yeonjun, maybe a bit shorter, but definitely around his height. The older man had a button up, checkered shirt on, tucked into a pair of dark brown slacks. He had socks on but was simply wearing slippers. Yeonjun had known Reverend Choi for a long time and never once did he see him smile fully. Smirk maybe but never smile and the older man always had a subtle sour look on his face every time Yeonjun was around which Yeonjun hated to see. And Yeonjun wasn’t around, he’d sport a poker face, one that screamed ‘respect me’.

There was a moment of awkward silence. They were just there, standing in front of each other and it suffocated Yeonjun badly. He didn’t know how to proceed and Yeonjun knew Reverend Choi wouldn’t be the one to break the awkward silence. So Yeonjun did the basic thing he could think of.

"Uh...thanks for letting me stay over and practice with Soobin," Yeonjun said, the silence deeming too much for him.

"I didn't let you," Reverend Choi said, voice stern and firm. Yeonjun gulped at the tone. He could hear the dislike in the Reverend's voice and at that moment, Yeonjun wanted to be anywhere else but there.

Reverend Choi took a step closer, eyes almost glaring, "If you think I don't see you every Sunday from where I stand, then you're wrong." 

Yeonjun didn't need to be told twice to know that that was a warning. That Reverend Choi would be keeping an eye on him and something told Yeonjun, it wouldn't be just every Sunday. 

The dense air kept on circling them until Choi Soobin finally called out from the top of the stairs. His voice managed to tear apart the staring contest that had momentarily happened between Yeonjun and Reverend Choi. 

"I got my script. Let's practice," the taller said and never in his life had Yeonjun been so thankful to Choi Soobin. 

"I'll be in my office if you need me. Which is right here," Reverend Choi said before taking his leave. Yeonjun just stood there, glaring at Reverend, even when it was only his back.

"Yeonjun?" Choi Soobin called, snapping Yeonjun out of his trance.

"Ah yeah, sorry," Yeonjun said, turning to Choi Soobin. The taller himself looked like he was worried for Yeonjun and Yeonjun prayed that he wouldn't ask what had happened. Fortunately though, Choi Soobin didn't. It was as if the taller knew not to pry and Yeonjun was thankful for it.

The rest of the day was spent practicing and rehearsing lines after lines of the script. Since Choi Soobin and him had a lot of lines together, it was more of a bonus for Yeonjun. They got so caught up in the rehearsing, Yeonjun almost forgot what had happened earlier. Yeonjun had come to terms with the fact that Choi Soobin had an air on him that made things feel different for Yeonjun. Something the latter still had no idea what. But for now, Yeonjun decided he liked it. Liked the calmness that came along with Choi Soobin. 

**********

The following days were spent rehearsing with Choi Soobin and Yeonjun had realized that the taller wasn't so bad. That on top of things, he was a bit interesting. A bit. There was just something about him that irked Yeonjun's interest. Like one occurrence was when Yeonjun was driving, his foot was finally healed enough to throw away the damn crutch and make him drive. Plus his car had been repaired in courtesy of his mom bringing it to the repair shop. Though Yeonjun would prefer to fix it himself. He'll tweak it a bit, he thought. On his way home from school, he saw Choi Soobin making his way into the cemetery. 

Yeonjun's initial thought was maybe he had someone to visit. But what made it odd was the fact that it was night and Choi Soobin had a large bag on his back. Either he really just needed to visit some dead relative or there was something ominous going on. In a fit of curiosity, Yeonjun parked just up front the cemetery entrance and decided to follow Choi Soobin, ignoring the many gruesome things his mind decided to conjure up. 

Choi Soobin was simply walking further into the cemetery and for some odd reason, this was when Yeonjun became scared. Yet he still followed Choi Soobin until finally they were in the middle of the cemetery. Yeonjun was keeping a good distance, observing Choi Soobin as he dropped his bag on the ground. 

"I know you're there, Yeonjun," Choi Soobin said and Yeonjun had a mini heart attack. Either Choi Soobin is psychic or Yeonjun was just bad at hiding. Either which, how the hell did he know Yeonjun was there. 

Having compromised his presence, Yeonjun came out of his hiding spot. Hands in his pockets, he said to Choi Soobin, "Hey."

"Hey," the taller said back.

"Do you usually walk inside the cemetery by yourself?" Yeonjun asked to which Choi Soobin shrugged.

"Maybe," he said, a small smile on his lips. Yeonjun was bewildered. Who the hell walks into the cemetery at night? 

"What are you doing here?" Yeonjun asked in his lack of words. Instead of answering, Choi Soobin simply smiled wider and opened his bag, he took out some things. Yeonjun tried to figure out what it was as Choi Soobin tried to assemble it. Only when it was finished did Yeonjun have an inkling on what it was.

"This is my telescope," Choi Soobin said. "I built it when I was thirteen."

"Impressive," Yeonjun said, partially joking. But truth be told, he really was impressed. The fact that Choi Soobin built a damn telescope at a tender age of thirteen was something to admire about. When Yeonjun was thirteen, he was more preoccupied with bicycle rides and being popular. 

"Wanna try?" Choi Soobin asked, snapping Yeonjun out of his daze. 

"Sure," was what Yeonjun said before crouching down and looking through eyepiece. Yeonjun could clearly see Saturn. Though small and minute from where he stood, he saw it.

"Saturn. Very cool," Yeonjun said, voice laced with astonishment. Choi Soobin seemed pleased with the praise.

"Yeah, I'm actually planning on building a bigger one. There's this comet that passes the earth every five hundred years. And it comes around spring, so I wanna see it," Choi Soobin said, completely taken by the wonder of the comet. 

"Well, nature's miracles I guess," Yeonjun said. "Look I get it. That you're into all this stuff."

Choi Soobin looked puzzled. "This stuff? I have my beliefs. I have faith. Don't you?"

Yeonjun almost laughed. The question was incredulous. Was Choi Soobin kidding? But as Yeonjun looked at the taller, Yeonjun knew he wasn't joking.

"No," Yeonjun answered, gazing away from Choi Soobin. "There's just too much bad shit in this world."

"Without suffering then there's no compassion," Choi Soobin argued.

"Yeah well, tell that to those who suffer," Yeonjun said, voice a matter-of-factly. He didn't mean to sound mean but he needed Choi Soobin to understand that people would always question everything once they suffer. And faith can be one of those things. The rest for the night was just them stargazing and afterwards, Yeonjun drove Choi Soobin home. A thank you for what the taller had done for him, as Yeonjun said. 

But truth be told, Yeonjun was enjoying the company that Choi Soobin offered. Maybe because they spent a lot of times together or maybe because he finally got to know the taller. Either way, he enjoyed hanging out with Choi Soobin. And Yeonjun could see that the taller felt the same way. But as much as Yeonjun wanted to indulge in it, he won't let himself, especially not in front of his friends. Because Choi Soobin and him were different.

**********

"Hey, Yeonjun. So I'll see after school?" Choi Soobin said the next day as he walked up to Yeonjun with that usual big smile. Yeonjun had half a mind to admire it. But when he saw Taehyun and Beomgyu by his side, he pushed the thought away. And instead of a simple reply, the usual sarcastic Yeonjun came back.

"In your dreams," he said, smirking. His friends were snickering behind him. And Yeonjun would have joined in but in truth, he didn't feel so good after saying it. Especially not after he saw Choi Soobin's smile fade away slowly that it pricked a little on Yeonjun's chest. The taller immediately left after which, eyes sad and poker-faced. Yeonjun wanted to run after but his own childish mind stopped him from doing so. Not at that moment. Maybe later, Yeonjun thought. Yeah maybe later. I'll apologize.

And Yeonjun did as he drove to Choi Soobin's house and once again pressed the doorbell. Choi Soobin was the one to answer and Yeonjun felt his heart ramming onto his chest. Has apologizing ever been this nerve-racking?

"Hey, Soobin--" Yeonjun said but before he could finish, Choi Soobin had closed the door shut. Yeonjun sighed, pissed. But he knew he deserved it for being an asshole. So he tried again, ringing the doorbell.

"Soobin, come on. Open the door, please," Yeonjun said. Not actually expecting the taller to open the door, Yeonjun stepped backward.

"What do you want?" Choi Soobin asked, arms crossed. Yeonjun didn't know what to do. Nor did he know what to say. So he said the first thing that came to his mind.

"Listen, I was hoping we could run lines together," Yeonjun said and yes, he's aware his dumb.

“Oh really?” Soobin asked.

“Yeah but you know…” Yeonjun said, lingering. He didn't know how to break it to Choi Soobin that they needed it to be private. But before he could form a coherent way of breaking it to the taller, Choi Soobin spoke up.

"Just in private and nobody else knows about it?" Choi Soobin said, smiling. Yeonjun tried to decipher if the smile itself was real. 

"Yeah, I thought we could surprise everybody with how good I get," Yeonjun said, smiling. Trying to keep the conversation going.

"Oh like secret friends," Choi Soobin's asked and Yeonjun smiled wider.

"Exactly. Exactly, it's like you read my mind," Yeonjun said and he thought that it was going well. That the situation had been appeased. But Yeonjun was once more wrong in his conclusion.

"Yeah, try reading mine," Choi Soobin said, his smile fading and Yeonjun knew he really fucked up bad. He knew what he did had affected Choi Soobin badly and oh, how he wished to re-do it. But if Yeonjun knew himself, he knew he wouldn’t have done anything different. With his pride and all. With not much to say, Choi Soobin turned to go back inside. 

"Soobin, I can't just be your friend," Yeonjun said as if the sentence would explain and remedy his actions.

"Look, Yeonjun. I thought I saw something in you. Something different. But I guess I was wrong," Choi Soobin said and without waiting for Yeonjun's response, he closed the door shut. Yeonjun was a bit too shocked to comprehend that Choi Soobin had gone and when the door closed, so was his opportunity to remedy the situation once again.

"Soobin. Come on," Yeonjun called but no matter how many times he did, he knew it was done. He knew he blew his chance and he was clueless on how to fix it. And so out of frustration he cursed which was a bad idea considering he was at the Reverend's house. So not only was Yeonjun pushed away, he was chased out, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I apologize for the late upload. I was a bit busy and when I wasn't, I forgot to update. There was also times that I had no idea how to continue the chapter itself even when I had a guide. I'll try to update every two weeks. I'm hoping to finish this amidst making my thesis. 
> 
> Also, I put Yeji and Heeseung's name in the story because as I was writing this, I was watching their performances in MMA and Yeji might just bias wreck me or smth and Heeseung is too and he's already my bias in enhypen ahsjk. They both caught my attention like they always do.


	3. But You Sing To Me Over And Over Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “All I know…” Yeonjun started, and at this point, he could care less what he says. “...is you’re beautiful.”
> 
> Soobin looked a bit surprised and Yeonjun wouldn’t blame him. He was surprised, too. But even though it was unplanned, Yeonjun found himself not regretting what he said because he knew that was the truth. He knew that it was how he felt right at that moment as he stared at Choi Soobin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 3.Hope You enjoy!!!

Yeonjun was restless.

The whole ordeal with Choi Soobin had affected him in a way Yeonjun wasn't used to. He thought that maybe it’s because he lost a script partner but Yeonjun remembered that they had onstage rehearsals after school until opening night, so that really wasn't it. Maybe because he was pissed at what happened, at how Choi Soobin slammed the door in front of him? Maybe but not entirely. Yeonjun tried all possible reasons he could conjure up in his head: Choi Soobin was annoying for doing what he did, Yeojun himself was annoying for doing what he did, he owed Choi Soobin a favor, Choi Soobin owed him a favor, witchcraft (dumb, he knows) and yet not a single reason convinced him why the fuck the entire scene mattered so much. To the point that it gnawed on him until now.

At one point, amidst his dilemma, Yeonjun found himself slumped in bed, looking through the previous year's school yearbook. Yeonjun had no idea why he took it in the first place. But he was too occupied with thoughts of Choi Soobin to even contemplate the reason behind it. So Yeonjun fancied himself to some fond and not so fond memories of the previous year. Maybe to distract himself or make himself feel better, either way, he did what he did. In the middle of scanning the yearbook, he stumbled among the profiles of his batchmate. One particular person caught his attention. 

Choi Soobin.

The very same Choi Soobin who had been running in his brain for the last couple of hours. Yeonjun had half a mind to slam the book close but for some reason he didn’t. Instead of succumbing to his anger, he succumbed to his curiosity. What was written on Choi Soobin’s yearbook info?

Choi Soobin's profile was written like any of the other students: name, grade, clubs, dreams and ambitions. But what nudged Yeonjun's interest was that of ambition itself. To witness a miracle, it said. It was definitely ambitious indeed. Miracles themselves were rare. Only happens to a select few and if you witnessed one, it’d be nice to see, as Yeonjun concluded. But miracles themselves, despite being rare, weren’t impossible. And somehow that one phrase nudged something in Yeonjun. Something he never thought he'd have. He wanted to give Choi Soobin that miracle. Make him believe that Choi Soobin was right for thinking he was different. Yeonjun doesn't completely understand why but he just wanted to do that, even if a little. To make Choi Soobin witness a miracle.

So when Saturday came and they needed to go back to the sister school, Yeonjun tried. Tried to get through to Doyun. But that itself had proven difficult. Doyun was distant, almost never says anything unless it's a complaint and Yeonjun was running out of options. Out of frustration, he stood up straight, sigh heavy and that's when he saw the basketball court. It was as if a lightbulb had light up on his head. 

"Hey, kid. Come outside with me," Yeonjun said and Doyun looked at him confused. Do yun had this basketball with him, so Yeojun snatched it quickly. Doyu was about to complain but didn;t get to as Yeonjun spoke up again.

"Just come on," was all Yeonjun said, voice stern like an order. Doyun could do nothing but follow. That is if he wanted his ball back.

The moment they stopped outside the first thing that welcomed them was strong rays of the sun and the seemingly unbearable heat. Yeonjun cursed under his breath, dreading stepping out in the first place. But he wanted to prove it. To Soobin, even when Soobin was probably unaware of what he was doing. So he swallowed what little pride he had and passed the ball to Doyun.

"Okay, It’s just me, you and the basket. We form the three sides of a triangle. Understand?" Yeonjun asked. Doyun doesn't respond, simply nods. 

"Okay, then take a step forward," Yeonjun aaid and Doyun nodded. As Doyun took a step forward, so did Yeonjun. 

"Okay, now, am I till the same angle as the basket?" Yeonjun asked.

"Yeah," Doyun finally replied.

“Are you?” Yeonjun asked again.

“Yeah” Doyun responded.

“So what did we just make?" Yeonjun asked, feeling proud at the fact that they were finally talking. A progress in Yeonjun’s books.

"A similar triangle," Doyun said, earning a huge smirk from Yeonjun. Doyun himself couldn't help but smile as well. 

"That's right," Yeonjun said. “Now make me an isosceles.”

Doyun did as told and stepped a step sideways to his left and Yeonjun could see that the kid knew what he was teaching. It took Yeonjun until then to understand that it wasn’t that Doyun didn't know about it but more like he didn’t care. And this realization made Yeonjun want to get to know Doyun more. Because the kid reminded him of himself.

But he stopped himself, knowing that this was progress itself and pushing more at the moment might only push the Doyun away. It might do more harm than good. In this case, taking it slow was the best option. Slow but effective, Yeonjun thought. So Yeonjun didn’t ask. Instead he said, "Now enough of this. Let's play."

Doyun immediately passed the basketball to Yeonjun and they found themselves in a game, which would pause once and a while for Yeonjun to teach Doyun what he needed to learn for the day. It was pretty hot still and sweat was practically dripping down his forehead but Yeonjun didn’t care at that point. And Doyun looked like he didn’t, too. So they kept playing until they were tired. At some point, amidst their game, Yeonjun was too immersed in the fun of it all, he didn't notice a pair of eyes watching him from inside.

**********

The rest of Yeonjun's weeks were pretty much spent rehearsing for the play. The amount of times they had repeated scenes after scenes made Yeonjun think he had already memorized the script. And truth be told, he had. Something Yeonjun thought he wouldn't be able to do.

They were currently rehearsing the bar scene where it required Yeji to shove Yeonjun a bit by his shoulder. And by a bit, it meant a lot. Choi Soobin was there, too, as the scene needed all three of them. And Yeonjun stopped to think for a second as to why he still called Choi Soobin by his full name in his head when they had spent enough time for Yeonjun to call him Soobin. Just Soobin. (Yeonjun had to fight the urge to say it out loud because for some odd reason, saying his name just felt right.)

Soobin was by the makeshift entrance of the stage. His character needed him to enter the bar during one rainy day in this scene. He was standing right behind Yeonjun as Yeji, led by Mr. Park practiced her lines repeatedly, in which to Yeonjun's dismay, was a seemingly endless repeat of shoving. Yeonjun never thought she’d have enough strength to shove him that hard. Yeonjun swore his shoulder must have been bruised by then.

Soobin was just standing there waiting for his cue and it took all of Yeonjun's strength and willpower not to turn towards him. But then what would they talk about. It had been days since the last time they talked after what Yeonjun did. If only he wasn't such a douchebag, maybe now he and Soobin would still be talking and rehearsing lines together. And Soobin would still talk to him and everything wouldn’t be so fucking awkward. But he had to go all 'in your dreams' on Soobin and now where did that get him?

The memory only gave Yeonjun a headache, so instead of focusing on Soobin, (which was hard to do considering the guy was practically behind him), he forced himself to focus on what his character was supposed to be doing, which was just standing there until Yeji had her line down. Just then, his phone buzzed and Beomgyu's smiley face popped up. 

Hey, Jjunie! Let's hangout! Wanna drink with us?

Yeonjun guessed that the younger ones were probably at the diner hanging out. He wanted to say yes and run like hell out of the theater because it had been a while since he had hung out with the younger ones and because he’s shoulders were killing him. But he didn’t. Because he needed to be there--wanted to be in that theater. 

Sorry, Gyu. Still rehearsing. Maybe next time.

It saddened him to send the text, to have to ditch his friends. But he did so anyway. Because right at that moment, Yeonjun didn't want to be anywhere but where he was. Where Soobin was. And Yeonjun would try to explain why he longed to be in the same room as Choi Soobin, why he longed for the simple glances they share when they pass each other by the hallways. But he couldn’t. Because he himself didn’t know why and for some reason, Yeonjun wasn’t in a hurry to know. Right at that moment, all that mattered to him was to be by Soobin’s side.

**********

Yeonjun didn’t expect himself to be there. Hell, he didn’t even know he had the balls to try and think about the guy after what he had done. What they had done. But here he was, in front of the rehabilitation center where Han JeonWoo was currently recovering. 

Yeonjun had contemplated ever since he was driving up to the center as to why he bothered to do what he was doing. Was it the guilt? Well, technically the very feeling itself had eaten him since the whole ordeal at the factory so Yeonjun knew that the guilt was really a constant companion at this rate. Was it to rid himself of all that guilt? Well, that would make things easier. Since the constant thing haunts him. Was it to reconcile or befriend Han Jeon Woo? Probably. The idea might have been awkward at the beginning but Yeonjun wasn’t really closed off to the idea now. Maybe, as Yeonjun thought, they could be good friends one day.

Was it to prove to himself and Choi Soobin that he really was different?

Now that was a question that had a vague answer. Part of Yeonjun didn’t want to admit that that was it. That he should take some pride in himself and stop thinking of the taller. That Soobin was the constant reason why he’s doing what he was doing. But Yeonjun knew that he was past denial. That he knew in himself that Soobin really was the main reason why he was doing all that he was doing. Was it to prove himself for pride? Or was it for another reason? Yeonjun wasn’t quite sure. All he knew at that moment was that Choi Soobin had somehow wedged his way into Yeonjun’s life and that Yeonjun didn’t mind. Not anymore. 

Maybe that thought itself made it easier--less harder--for Yeonjun to face Han Jeon Woo and try to apologize. The kid was lying down on the bed, attention solely focused on the television. Han Jeon Woo didn’t even notice Yeonjun there until the latter had been close enough. 

Han Jeon woo’s initial reaction to Yeonjun’s presence was a scowl followed by his eyes rolling. Yeonjun expected as much. He was pretty sure he was the last person Han Jeon Woo wanted as a visitor. Yeonjun wouldn’t be shocked if Han Jeon Woo wouldn’t forgive him at all. Yet despite it all, Yeonjun took a deep breath before speaking.

“I came to say I’m sorry,” Yeonjun said, hands stuffed in his pockets. It was awkward and the fact that Han Jeon Woo’s immediate response was a shrug didn’t help.

“The thing you did? Do you feel better?” Han Jeon Woo asked and Yeonjun had to look away for a moment. He glanced at the TV with it’s usual boring soap operas, one Yeonjun wasn’t too keen on watching before looking back towards Han Jeon Woo.

“No, I don’t,” Yeonjun said. “I feel like shit.”

There was this still silence, one that Yeonjun didn’t fancy to be in. He was practically anxious as he waited for Han Jeon Woo to speak up. The kid had been contemplating, silent as he looked at Yeonjun and Yeonjun couldn't decipher if the look he had in his eyes were of anger or just boredom. That was how anxious he was. 

“You know what, I-I actually wanted to be your friend,” Han Jeon Woo said, minutes later, scoffing at the very idea of the sentence. “Now I don’t even know why. No idea.”

Han Jeon Woo had looked away, probably too uncomfortable to look at Yeonjun. Or maybe he was just in a state of disbelief in himself. Which was it? Yeonjun didn’t know. But he did know that he needed to make amends with this kid. To try and make things work somehow even if it’s just acquaintances.

“I made that jump once. Thought I was a badass,” Yeonjun said and truth be told, this was new to him. He had never really told anyone about how he felt during his own “initiation”. It was something Yeonjn just shoved down like any other feelings and thoughts that didn’t really sit well with him. But now, for some reason, it felt like the right thing to say. 

“I remember saying that I meant...I meant...to belly flop,” Yeonjun said, dryly laughing as he remembered what happened. He remembered the laughter that roared from the mouths of his friends when he said those words. It wasn’t the most pleasant memory. And thinking about it now, it was the dumbest thing he could have done. Well, one of the dumbest. 

“Did it hurt?” Han Jeon Woo asked, looking back at Yeonjun, voice monotonous and face blank.

“Like hell,” Yeonjun said, a lace of mischief in his voice. There was a smile slowly forming itself onto Han Jeon Woo’s face and Yeonjun knew he had been forgiven.

“Good,” Han Jeon Woo said, smirking. Yeonjun couldn’t help but smirk as well. If he knew that apologizing, sincerely at that, was this easy and freeing, he would have done it a long time ago. But then if he had listened to his gut then, stopping Han Jeon Woo from jumping then maybe he wouldn’t be there. Yeonjun shook his head, bringing himself back to the conversation.

“Well, I’ll see you in school then,” he said, earning a slight nod from Han Jeon Woo. Yeonjun didn’t know but somehow the nod itself silently confirmed that he and Han Jeon Woo would become good friends someday. He doesn’t know how well or when it will happen or if it will happen eventually. But the very thought itself gave Yeonjun a sense of calmness. Somehow he did something right and good for once.

**********

Two days after his visit, Yeonjun found himself in the backstage dressing room of the theater. It had been the opening night of the play and Yeonjun had never felt so nervous as he did then. Even more than he felt when he apologized to Han Jeon Woo. This was actually the first time he ever felt so nervous in his entire life. Probably.

Who knew a small play could rattle “the” Choi Yeonjun? It was funny really and Yeonjun would’ve laugh at it if he weren’t so nervous. Yeonjun did his best to calm down. Going as far as doing push ups and jumping jacks, activities which were frowned upon by his make-up artist, Yena.

“Yeonjun, stop moving so much. Your make-up will get smudge. It’s not much but we don’t can’t keep retouching it even before the show starts,” Yena scolded, prompting Yeonjun to sit back down the nearest chair he could find.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. Yena simply nods before turning his attention to Park Sunghoon, another cast member. Yeonjun tried again to settle down his nerves by not moving around but the only option he had was to either play with his phone or space out. He got a text from Beomgyu saying he was there which distracted him a bit but the conversation itself was short. So Yeonjun settled for spacing out.

Amidst his activity, Yeonjun noticed that he hadn’t seen Soobin since he had arrived. He was pretty sure Soobin would be somewhere near considering their dressing rooms were only a curtain apart. But not once did he see the taller, not even a strand of his hair and that’s just him being overly dramatic. Yeonjun searched the entire backstage, never did he find Soobin. 

He was about to ask where Soobin had been, the search proving useless but before he could, the final call had been announced. And so Yeonjun just opted to see Soobin on stage.

**********

“Pour me a drink, Joey,” Yeonjun said in character. They were currently in the latter half of the second act where his character had done the opposite of what he promised Yeji’s character earlier. They were on a stage designed in a nineties style bar with it’s counter bars, checkered floor, jukeboxes and mini stage where hired talents would perform. Cast members were gathered around, some sitting others by the jukebox. Yeji and Yeonjun stood by the bar with Park Sunghoon, whose role was that of a barista, Joey. Yeji, in total character, had her arms to her hips, acting angry in response to Yeonjun’s line. Park Sunghoon, as his character demanded of him, poured a glass of what looked like alcohol, when in truth it was just juice, before giving it to Yeonjun.

“You promised me, Tommy. No more of your no good schemes,” Yeji said her lines, hands on her hips. She huffed in anger and face twisted in pretend pain. “You promised me we’d go to Paris.”

“I’m not going to sit down and do nothing while the fat cats in this town get rich,” Yeonjun said to a seemingly angered Yeji and for a moment, he admired the girl’s ability to act. To fully absorb the character. Yeonjun could only dream to be that good. But then, this was his first time.

“Trust me, this is a sure deal,” Yeonjun said, continuing his lines as he sipped his drink. Yeji scoffed as needed for her character.

“That’s it,” Yeji said, walking forward just to stop in front of Yeonjun. “We are through.”

She immediately walked back to her earlier position, the feelings of the character still plastered on her face. And for some odd reason, it helped Yeonjun keep in character. They had practiced this scene over and over again, to the point that Yeonjun’s shoulder seems bruised, but only then did he see how it paid off. He guessed that his bruised shoulder was getting some sort of compensation.

“Go run your booze, you big idiot. I hope you drown in it,” Yeji said, snapping Yeonjun back. She was about to walk away but stopped midway as Soobin walked in, covered in a cloak. For a split second, Yeonjun’s heart came ramming onto his chest. It was the first time he had seen the taller that day, so even though he couldn’t see Soobin’s face, he was still delighted to see him. But Yeji, on the other hand, still in character, felt otherwise.

“So, you must be the new guy he’s hired,” Yeji said, voice laced in contempt and side-eyed Yeonjun. “The singer.”

Yeonjun continued to act indifferent towards Yeji as his character demanded of him. The act itself was exhausting but he had to hand it to himself for surviving for so long in the play.

“Want some free advice on this one?” Yeji said, prompting Yeonjun out of his thoughts. “Stay far away. He’s nothing but trouble.”

Yeji immediately stormed off backstage, ending her character’s scene in the play. Soobin, on the other hand, walked in still cloaked. Yeonjun tried to see what he was wearing, tried to see what he looked like. Did he have make-up on like Yeonjun? Or did he not? Yeonjun tried to peer in but the cloak covered him pretty nicely that only his lower face could be seen. Yeonjun couldn’t help but stare at Soobin’s lips. It shone bright pink and the thought of how they would feel came running in Yeonjun’s head. He gulped.

“Excuse me, where should I stand?” Soobin asked, snapping Yeonjun out of his thoughts.

“Uh, o-on the s-stage,” Yeonjun said, gesturing clumsily at the stage. Soobin mumbled a small thank you before heading to the stage where he “performed” a song (it was just background music and Soobin just lip synced to them.)

Yeonjun shook his head awake. He needed to focus. He couldn't stay standing there gawking at Soobin, whom he can’t even see the face to considering he had a cloak on. And for the majority of the scene, he managed to deliver his lines, and managed to act his character. Beomgyu’s presence by the audience helped distract him from Soobin and somehow made it through (the fact that Beomgyu was true to his word about the tomatoes though almost threw Yeonjun off his game. He was just thankful that Beomgyu didn’t throw them at him. He was too busy wrapped around Taehyun). And Yeonjun in his quiet, little illusion thought he had survived. That he would manage to act out all his scenes until it was the final scene of the final act that is.

The scene was still set in the bar, yet unlike before, it was bare of people with the exception of Yeonjun and a cloaked Soobin. The chairs were placed on top of the table, upside down and the lights dim. Yeonjun no longer wore his jacket, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The fact that it was only the two of them left on stage made Yeonjun more nervous than he already was. It was just him and Soobin and nobody else. And as much as they had practiced the whole scene over and over again, this time it was different. It was different in a way that it was the opening night. It was different in a way that there were people, his friends even, watching him from the audience (Yeonjun was sure he saw Beomgyu finally off Taehyun and trying to aim a tomato at him as a prank while Hueningkai tried to hushly stop him.)

It was different in a way that ever since that morning, Yeonjun had not seen Soobin’s face. He had not seen what Soobin wore or how he looked in his outfit. Or what his outfit looked like in the first place. Soobin, at that moment, was just a cloaked figure with only half his face showing. It would seem scary if put together but to Yeonjun he found it mysterious in a good way. He’d fancy himself more if he could, to relish in this mystery, but he can’t because he was in a play and he was the lead and he had a line to say.

“Look, I don't blame you,” Yeonjun said, trailing his gaze from Soobin to the audience. “I ain’t asking for forgiveness either.”

Yeonjun was getting into character, focusing his mind on being Tommy. Saying each line with emotions he seldom showed even to himself. Maybe he was too focused on acting. Maybe, he was so into character, he hadn't noticed Soobin take off the cloak.

“I did what I had to…” Yeonjun said, voice trailing as he saw Soobin. The taller was wearing an all black outfit, a black turtleneck with a black blazer, highlighting his snow like skin. His lips were pinkish red, eyes shaded with a hint of eyeshadow. He had his hair parted and fake earrings were hanging on his ears. He looked dazzling and it took all of Yeonjun’s willpower not to freak out right then and there.

Yeonjun tried to calm down, tried to focus and remember his lines. But it was hard, especially when Soobin set the cloak on the table and sat across Yeonjun.

“Uhh, when you walk out of the rain and into my club. That wasn’t just a coincidence, was it?” Yeonjun was desperately trying to continue, to wrack his brain for the next lines. But Choi Soobin sitting right across him, looking like an angel proved it was hard to do. Especially when the taller let out a smile so beautiful, Yeonjun could melt.

“Nothing’s a coincidence,” Soobin said, lips curved in a smile. 

“Your face. You look so familiar,” Yeonjun said, trying to remember the next few lines. “Like this person I knew once, only it wasn’t real, it was a dream.”

“Tell me about this person in your dreams,” Soobin asked and that’s when Yeonjun’s mind went blank. He tried to recall, looking anywhere and everywhere but Soobin. But no matter how much he wracked his brain out, how hard he tried to recall, nothing came. So Yeonjun responded in the best way he knew how.

“Well, I don’t...remember,” Yeonjun said and yes, it wasn’t the best thing to say at that moment. But Yeonjun wasn’t really in the best state of mind as well. He tried to continue, looking at Mr. Park and Lee Heesung for help but they simply asked him to go on with a series of hand gestures, which only made Yeonjun even more of a mess. 

“All I know…” Yeonjun started, and at this point, he could care less what he says. “...is you’re beautiful.”

Soobin looked a bit surprised and Yeonjun wouldn’t blame him. He was surprised, too. But even though it was unplanned, Yeonjun found himself not regretting what he said because he knew that was the truth. He knew that it was how he felt right at that moment as he stared at Choi Soobin. 

There was this deafening silence that came after. It was as if the entire theater had figured out that Yeonjun messed up. So Yeonjun looked back at Mr. Park, asking for help once more.

‘The song. The song,’ Mr. Park mouthed and as if an idea popped into his head, Yeonjun immediately looked back to Soobin.

“The dream,” he started. “Help me remember. Will you sing for me?”

Yeonjun's voice came off like a request and Yeonjun didn’t know if he was still acting or not. But whatever he did queued the music and prompted Soobin to start his performance.

There's a song that's inside  
Of my soul  
It's the one that I've tried to write  
Over and over again  
I'm awake in the infinite cold  
But you sing to me over and over and over again

Soobin’s voice came off warm and fuzzy. Like it always did when he sang in church. Yet, even though this wasn’t the first time Yeonjun heard Soobin sing, it felt like something new. Like something that felt like home.

So I lay my head back down  
And I lift my hands and pray  
To be only yours I pray  
To be only yours  
I know now you're my only hope

Yeonjun followed Soobin as he stood up and trailed along the stage. And when he couldn’t see him, he’d let his ears do the following. It was captivating, the song and Soobin. Yeonjun found himself transfixed. Completely in awe. Then came this feeling in his chest. Like a feeling of warmth spreading across. It wasn’t anything searing but more, pleasing.

Sing to me the song of the stars  
Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again  
When it feels like my dreams are so far  
Sing to me of the plans  
That you have for me over again

Yeonjun contemplated what it was. What the feeling that had grown within him. It was the first time he had felt it. The first time he felt his heart beating so loudly and the way his breath hitched as he got a glimpse of Soobin made Yeonjun feel somehow fuzzy. Yeonjun didn’t understand. He tried to but this was new. Yeonjun tried his best to mask his confusion, sporting a poker face. But deep inside, he was a mess. A much bigger one than he had been.

So I lay my head back down  
And I lift my hands and pray  
To be only yours I pray  
To be only yours I know now you're my only hope

But as Soobin walked past him again as per choreography, it was like a bright idea. Like an epiphany surging it’s way into every fiber of his being. His eyes trailed after Soobin, staring at him so hard he could burn holes on the taller. And when Soobin gazed at him slightly before turning back to the audience, Yeonjun knew what it was. Knew exactly what he had felt.

I give you my destiny  
I'm giving you all of me  
I want your symphony  
Singing in all that I am  
At the top of my lungs  
I'm giving it my all

Choi Yeonjun had carelessly fallen in love with Choi Soobin and there was no going back.

So I lay my head back down  
And I lift my hands and pray  
To be only yours I pray  
To be only yours I pray  
To be only yours I know now you're my only hope

As Soobin finished his song, he took a sit right across Yeonjun, lips curled into a smile. Yeonjun had been mesmerized by his lips all night long and now, with the new found discovery of his feelings, Yeonjun was a wreck. His mind had already gone blank, filled with nothing but Choi Soobin and the epiphany itself had given him this sense of euphoria. 

Maybe Yeonjun really had lost his mind or maybe he was just listening to his heart. He doesn’t know. All he knew was when Soobin stared at him and the curtains slowly drew to a close, Yeonjun took Soobin’s lips in his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually had this written out already as I was editing Chapter two. But I became busy with school and it took long for me to edit this itself. I’m sorry for taking so long with both chapters.
> 
> Also, Doyun and Han Jeon Woo are fictional characters. They’re not real. I just created them on a whim to help with the storyline.


End file.
